The First Smell-O-Vision of Spring

I’m sitting in front of the space heater in my office because it’s the coldest room in the house. Colder than the basement, somehow.

But it is 61 degrees outside so Kitten Thunder is enjoying some smell-o-vision upstairs on the cat shelf.

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The expected high temperature tomorrow is 33 degrees.  Ah, springtime in the Rockies.

Approval Ratings

The surveys are in. Polls have been taken. And my approval rating is at an all time low. I’m really going to have to do something special to improve or another Girl will be able to move in and beat me at the next election.

First there was Jigger-gate last weekend. Enough said.

Then, once we finally got that resolved, The Boy and I both made bad political moves by returning to work on Monday. Not only did we not ask Kitten Thunder if it was okay, we disregarded their opinion when they reached out to us.

And it was a busy week.

I had what some might consider a “crap ton” of client work, plus two bracelets to finish for the silent auction at the Fur Ball that is this weekend. The Boy had a 6:30 a.m. meeting (WHA?!?) and a meeting Monday night. I also had a meeting Monday night, but I couldn’t find it. Instead, I spent half an hour driving up and down the road looking for it before giving in to my headache and going home. Where I had more client work. And bracelets. This meant NO snuggle time for either kitten.

Unacceptable.

Tuesday was more of the same. I worked all the way through the day with no lunch break. Oliver supervised from his box on my desk. He mostly expressed his displeasure in no snuggling. But I did NOTHING to fix the situation, other than suggest that HE should come sit in my lap. Why, he wanted to know, should he do all the work?

On top of this, Obi wasn’t asking for belly rubs. Tuesday night we finally confronted him. Was he giving up belly rubs for Lent? It turns out, he wasn’t asking because he didn’t want to be rejected. Now that is cleared up and The Boy’s approval ratings have soared. It also doesn’t hurt that The Boy is fighting off a cold so he’s had more couch time than usual.

In an attempt to bolster my own ratings, I announced my plans for Pajama Wednesday. Kitten Thunder loves Pajama Wednesday. But, after a small spike, my ratings plummeted when they discovered that I intended to work. At my desk. And THEN, in the afternoon, I got dressed. IN CLOTHES! (This last paragraph isn’t quite true…I didn’t actually intend to spend all day in my pajamas and only realized I wasn’t IN the clothes I’d ironed when I started thinking about leaving) And then I left.

Unacceptable.

This morning, I was the one with a crack of too early in the morning meeting. The day started out great with my curling iron going berserk and frying a chunk of my bangs. It was so hot, the whole section just disintegrated. And it smelled horrible.

Obi did not approve.

Then I was gone all morning. When I returned, I sat on the couch to eat lunch. Oliver was not coveting on the back of the couch and he wrinkled his nose because my hair still smelled like I’d set it on fire.

Oli did not approve.

Then I left again.

No one, not even me, approved.

Now, all the big projects are done and tomorrow is just another work day. Hopefully the kittehs will stick with me until Saturday. I think I can pull out all the stops on Saturday and recover in the polls.

After all, I have a great platform: the couch.

 

Inroads

It was state hockey weekend again and that meant lots of visitors for Kitten Thunder. My parents, along with Cousin Jigger, stayed at our house. And, since my nephew’s games were at way-too-early a.m., my niece also stayed with us.

The biggest issue Oliver and Obi has is that Lexi didn’t bring Barbi with her. What good is a little girl without a doll? So she bought one on Saturday – both cats helped get her out of the packaging and tried out her hands for chin scritching.

Meanwhile, on the dog front, things went a little more smoothly. No one got punched in the nose. Kitten Thunder spent most of their time in the living room with us…watching. It started out a little tense. But as the weekend went by, everyone calmed down.

Then, everyone discovered they have an interest in common.

CommonGroundWho doesn’t like squirrel watching?

***

An hour after everyone left yesterday, the squirrel came to the window sill and looked in at me on the couch. He wanted to know where his audience was.

***

This morning, I was glad that the audience was gone: spring has arrived an OutTV is a tiny bit pornographic. I’m thinking about piping mood music out to the front porch.

Not that they seem to need music.

 

Squirrels on Rye

The Boy and I don’t eat the same kind of bread. Being the only people in our house, we hardly ever finish a loaf of bread before it gets stale or molds or I just buy another loaf because I forgot to see what we had before I went to the store. This leads to a lot of extra bread.

Squirrel bait.

The same happens with tortillas, though not as often. When it was -20 degrees, I wasn’t putting out food because squirrels aren’t crazy. That is the exact type of weather that they store nuts or whatever for. So we had a surplus.

A giant stacks of the ends of breads and tortilla dregs. I did what anyone would do in this circumstance: I set up a taste test.

The results: Squirrels prefer rye bread over tortillas. But they’ll eat them both.

Next week we’ll be testing to see if they like my wheat bread over rye. Seriously…who wouldn’t?

A Life Less Miserable

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Life for Kitten Thunder was more tolerable today than it usually is. For one thing, Oliver has broken the fortress in perfectly. He has spent a good portion of the day laying there. So comfortable. And brother free.

Then, while laying in the fortress, Oliver saw something amazing! His condo!

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Although Oliver has actually seen the condo in the dining room before – and been placed in it repeatedly – it didn’t occur to him that this could be a suitable napping spot. Today he hopped right up in it and settled in for an extended nap.

Did I know, he queried, that you can see the whole front of the house out this window? And that there is bread right here, inches away, that squirrels will come and eat while sitting on the sill?

OutTV and napping are an excellent combination.

Obi is also less miserable today. His Boy came home yesterday. They are almost caught up on the belly rubbing.

Almost.

***

I’ve been meaning to say this for three weeks: Hi Grandma! I’m glad your knee surgery went well! Hugs, kisses and purr therapy from Cheyenne.

Funnies from the cat world

Oh, you’re home.

The Boy was gone this weekend and I had big plans to get things done. And I did. If you consider sitting on the couch with Kitten Thunder getting something done, I did.

Obi and Oliver spent the whole weekend doing coordinated snuggling so I couldn’t get off the couch. They let me up to eat – if I fed them too – and go to bed. And to the bathroom as long as they could go too.

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Obi watched Black Sails with me. He said I could take his picture to send to The Boy to show him how dire things were here on the homefront.

We did manage to brush Obi, do the dishes, and work a little bit on the bracelets I’m donating to the Fur Ball (tickets still available). And I rearranged some furniture – this with both Obi and Oliver helping IMMENSELY. I don’t like the new arrangement, but I’ve lost the will to fix it.

So…since that’s all there was to the weekend, I bring you photos of Cat Shaming. Have you ever noticed that the cats don’t really seem ashamed at all? Your homework: what has your cat done that s/he SHOULD be ashamed of?

Detective Oliver and the Case of the Missing Mama

A blog by Oliver, dictated to…someone (we can’t tell you who, it would ruin the ending).

I was sleeping in my chair last night after dinner. It had been a long day of supervising The Girl as she worked on the couch. Plus, there was snow to watch on OutTV. So, understandably, I was exhausted.

The Girl had gone downstairs to work out and I’d assigned supervision duties to Obi. The Boy was on the couch watching television. I blinked for a moment and noticed Obi was on the couch with The Boy. I blinked again and The Girl was standing by me, kissing my head. She said something about going upstairs to read. I blinked again and she was gone. I blinked again and The Boy was also gone. I was alone. It was dark.

But where did my people go? If only I had some clues.

“PEOPLE!” I yelled. I heard some giggles from the second floor and a voice called “Oliver.” That’s me. I’m Oliver. But I couldn’t talk to the voice upstairs, I was looking for my Girl.

I checked the food bowl in the breakfast nook. She was not there.

“PEEEEEEEOOOOPLE!” I called again. From the second floor, another voice called “we’re up here, pudding head.” I could not be distracted by the voices. I had to find The Girl and The Boy. Funny, that second voice sounded a lot like The Boy’s, now that I think about it.

I continued to look for clues.

I looked down into the basement. It was dark. You might be surprised, but I deduced she wasn’t down there anymore. The Girl usually turns on lights when she goes down there. Eliminating the basement, there were only two options: The Girl was invisible on the main floor, or she was upstairs. With the voices.

I went to the stairs and climbed as far as the creaky step. I stopped to reconsider the invisibility possibility. I mean, this seems very likely and I hardly looked for her at all. “Girl?” I called. “GIRL?”

“Oliver Pi,” the first voice called from upstairs. “Come to bed.” It sounded a lot like her, but people all sound the same to me. Since The Girl didn’t respond to my calls on the first floor, I continued up to the bedroom to search some more.

Obi was laying on the foot of the bed, giving me a look. Obviously, he was looking to me for guidance on how we would find our people. He’s rather attached to The Boy.

Then, I heard it! Kissy noises! The tell tale sound of The Girl. I was so close to discovering her whereabouts. With one final turn, I rounded the foot of the bed. And there she was.

I jumped up onto the bed and crawled under the covers to comfort my Girl. I bumped her chin with my head a couple times and licked her cheek. I purred as hard as I could to let her know I will always find her, no matter how many times she gets lost in the house.

“You’re such a dork,” she said and hugged me to her chest. Dork, in case you don’t know, means “excellent detective.”

Battle: Fortress

I was cleaning the house today and ruthlessly tossing out parts of kitty playland; I removed several shopping bags, some tissue paper, and flattened boxes. Then I rebuilt the fortress in our entry way that consists of one large piece of paper and two boxes. I crumpled some tissue paper and tossed it in the box.

Oliver promptly climbed into the box and shoved the tissue out.

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Obi arrived and pushed the paper ceiling down. Oliver ran from the fortress and there was a flurry of furry. A furry flurry.

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Obi returned to stomp the paper down some more.

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He tried out the inside of the fortress as Oliver returned.

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But if it wasn’t going to cause a thunder, Obi didn’t really want to be in the box.

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Oli reclaimed the box as Obi came to see what I was doing, laying flat on the floor in the living room.

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Oliver made himself comfortable on the inside of the fortress. Obi found his spot on the outside.

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I was inspired, after seeing the floor at this angle, to sweep.

And all was right with the world.

Oh Brudder

I’ve mentioned that we have a new morning routine. That includes Oliver leaving our post-breakfast snuggle to take a bath in the recliner. Then The Boy comes by and covers him with the blanket. At first he was tucking the grey kitten in. Lately, though, he’s been carefully draping the blanket over both arms of the recliner, making a nice big cave.

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Oliver can stay in this cave for hours. Unless his brother wants to thunder.

This morning, Obi came tearing across the living room and jumped onto the “flat surface” of the blanket. He didn’t know Oli was under there, he swears. The blanket started to move and Oliver’s head popped up between the blanket and the back of the recliner. He climbed out of his cave.

Obi jumped down and ran a couple feet. He looked back.

Oliver resettled himself on top of the blanket and went back to sleep. Somehow, the blanket remained held up, slightly, by the arms so the grey kitten enjoyed a hammock. For a while. Then the brown kitten returned. Obi climbed into the cave and poked his brother from below.

Then he jumped down and ran a couple feet. He looked back.

Oliver was not chasing him.

Obi came and sat with me, sighing. After he’d maxed out mom time – about five minutes later – he went back to the recliner and tried again. Climb. Poke. Jump. Run. Look. It didn’t work so he went to get a snack. And tried again. Climb. Poke. Jump. Run. Look.

Nope.

The brown kitten tried all day to get his brother to thunder. As far as I know, it never happened. Eventually all the effort wore him out. He stretched out on the loveseat for a nap and I draped the big quilt over the whole seat, kitten and all, to make a nice big cave.

And Oliver has hopped up on top for a nap.